“Utah provides much inspiration.”

That’s what she said to me.
That is all she could say to me.
She was married
finally happy, if only for a moment
after years of submission
willed or volunteered
willed and volunteered
years of his way
years of no choice
years of “…just this one for me…”

and finally feeling she mattered
naturally
she was seeing love
where she was
in what she was staring at
when she said that…
in Utah.

She knows that it’s almost over;
leaving her no choice but to make the most of every moment now.

But Utah?
Did it have to be Utah that she chose?

That is when I realized
my disappointment in ordinariness;
people dare, they leap
but they do it all together
safely
never understanding the irony.  

This woman who will not go away
who keeps appearing in all the gin joints
in all of New York
every few years;
something magical within my wanderlust dreams

And she asks,
every time,
What of the omens;
unwilling to understand
the irony
refusing to believe the signs…

Especially in Utah!

af

(written on computer, disappointed again, still hoping to be proven incorrect)