I am so intimidated by writing
there is always too much
and I feel too narcissistic telling you
the details of my day
the mountains and oceans
the quirks, heartaches and achievements
I get sad
my stomach begins to ache
and I need a day to check out,
to lock myself inside and bleed out some anguish on a page
I am not writing it all
I know there are doors locked
risks begging to be taken
It makes me think of the two people
waiting at the corner
staring at the don’t walk sign
with all streets as empty as a Baptist town on Sunday
They wouldn’t dare move until the sign changed…
How certain we are that rules are best for us
that rules are even necessary
I have traveled quite far
from insufficiencies I have lived with
lived as
I understand something that I can put no thought to
but that I trust
for no reason whatsoever
I do not try to have a happy, successful life
because I know it is meant to be a ride
with all the ups and downs one would expect
from the intensity of balance
And I know,
no matter what happens,
I will never stop moving forward
Poetry is a process
a lifelong craft to be developed;
the push giving me the strength
to face the fears of this road
and get through one door at a time
af
(written on computer)
These last three for Audrey were “artist’s choice”. I started writing it in LA after watching, over and over, people standing at Don’t Walk signs but refusing to cross the street even though there are no cars in sight…